Thursday 21 July - Glory be!

I don't gamble.
Not because of self righteous views, (though I suspect I have a few to use in case of emergencies), nor religious views (in fact I find the religious enjoy gambling most of all, you gamble, go to church and be forgiven your sins, and still have time to make it back for some late Sunday night bingo), or even because I'm on a limited budget.

I just find it immensely dull!

I was taken to a casino once by an ex. We had a dollop of money to use and go nuts on! It was quiet an exciting thought! I'd never done it before and I figured there'd be tons of games to try my somewhat dodgy luck on! Really I thought it would be most entertaining!!

When we got there I decided no roulette for me, it was just a bit too much like giving away cash free, and no cards because I always lose at blackjack and poker. (Funny whenever I tell people that they immediately suggest a game of strip poker - wonder why...)

So I decided the machines it would be!
(I don't know what they're officially called. Back in my caveman days they were known as "one arm bandits" but they've lost their arms and "many buttoned boredom" is, I'm told not the right name, if the right description.)

Oh because it was boring!!!

All you do is feed your money in, press a button (If it's very thrilling then oh oh, maybe press a second button) and wait...
That's it!
There's no skill, no game, no fun! You win some cash or you lose twice as much.

Oh Nelly hold me down before the excitement bowls me over!

And yet folk do it! They do it for HOURS!! They specifically come to the casino to do just that!

Then you hear stories like, "I won R30 000!"
And I'm like, "My my! What did you do with it and can I swap two R10's for a R20?"
And they're reply?
"Well I won R30 000, but then I lost it again! But I did win it!!"
Um.
Ok.
We'll be sure to erect a plaque in your honour...
Then you find out not only did they lose that cash, but all the cash they came with as well and then they won't give your two R10's back because they want to eat something, anything, STOP BITING MY ARM!!!

I know some people win big. But it's a bit like when people say, "Your uncle Tad had no schoolin' n' he now owns two trailers n' a pig!"
Yes there are success stories but we hear about them because they are not the norm, they are the exception! The exception to the very big rule of YOU LOSE!

Well in the end, if it makes them happy and they don't forget their kids on the stove, well then, to each his own. But if we go then please drop me off at the movies or at the kiddies entertainment land so that my cash at least buys me memories I'm going to want to look back on!